Kath and Kaggers on Womanhood

In the junior days of our friendship Rachel and I exchanged some delightful banter on what it means to be a woman. The exchange is posted below. I think that after reading it you will not be able to deny that the world owes us a large amount of gratitude for furthering the cause of women.

Note: All non-woman type issues have been removed from these messages because I’m a woman and you have no power over me. Unless you are David Bowie, then maybe you have a little, but only when you wear tight pants. Are you with me, lady pals? Don’t answer that, I know you are.

It’s okay if your mind is blown by the extreme amount of feminism. But seriously bros, I do strive to be more ladylike. Not in a lame cooking and cleaning kind of way but I often think that if I knew more about etiquette and proper behavior I would feel less awkward. I think the Victorians have the answers, to everything.

Just ignore all the overtly sexist stuff and you’re golden. Not me though, I’m not golden, my womanhood always gets conquered by sunflower seeds. Not like that though.

Kathryn Rawson July 26 at 2:06pm
I cook in a very non-aproned, minimalist kind of way. I love delicious food but I am not a skilled cook. Mostly because I am bad at being a woman. Although I am quite a good at cleaning. There's hope for me yet.

Rachel Kagan July 26 at 3:43pm
It’s hard being a woman. Always having to wear homely dresses, wearing rouge, baking cookies, feeling repressed, mopping, cooking, not being allowed to talk about politics, fixing the men-folk martinis. Hmm, not sure why I just went all 50s like that…anyway, I’ll trade you my cooking skills for your cleaning skills. Is there a facebook application to do that?

Kathryn Rawson July 26 at 5:22pm

If you spliced us together into one person we would make a complete woman. Now we are only shadowy disgraces of proper women. I vote for splicing over a facebook sponsored trade of domestic abilities. Which reminds me, do you know a ladylike way to eat sunflower seeds? Because I don't.

Rachel Kagan July 26 at 5:55pm
My god, you are right, between your cleaning abilities and embracing of the apocalypse/scary things, and my cooking abilities and fear of everything, together we represent the modern day woman.

The ladylike way to do that is whatever the opposite of sitting with your legs open and spitting seeds everywhere. So basically that means keeping your legs crossed at all times and not eating them and smiling politely.